One of the first things Darrell wanted to do when we found out we were expecting a boy, was to build his first big boy bed for him. A great talent and passion of Darrell’s was woodwork, we were in the process of restoring a great big Victorian house when de died and he was doing all the woodwork single-handed. Another great (secret) talent was Pintersting. He spent hours pinning photographs onto boards trying to decide what he would make this future son of his.
When we brought Elijah home with us from the hospital he was to sleep in the beautiful nursery we so lovingly created for him, in his beautiful beach wood cot. Being a very nervous first time mummy I had the cot set out exactly as suggested in all the SIDS guides and with two baby monitors, monitoring his movements. I was to sleep in the antique wrought iron single bed in his room so I was right on hand to feed and soothe him whenever he needed me. Darrell was going to sleep in our room as he really needed his sleep as his fire season would have started. Elijah decided to arrive at 36 weeks (see birth story here which meant that Darrell was on his long leave in between the North and South fire seasons. The first night home Darrell said he would miss us too much to have us both sleeping in a different room. So there Darrell and I both climbed into a child sized single bed staring into the cot of our newborn son. We stayed like that all night. None of us slept and we only realized that our tiny baby was not sleeping because he was cold at 4am and then took him into our little bed with us. We then decided that we all needed to sleep together in Elijah’s room until season satarted so moved a spare double bed in there so Elijah would have either one or both of us in with him. We felt it was a good idea for him to get used to staying in his own space and that our room stayed ours.
Darrell died and a few months later Elijah and I moved to Cape Town. By this stage I had nervously gone back to sleeping in my own room as I desperately needed the rest and Elijah was a very good sleeper. All went very well until I felt Elijah was too big for his cot. Unfortunately Darrell had passed away before he got the chance to build his sweet boy the most awesome big boy bed any boy could want. So just after he turned two I started looking around for a big boy bed. It was a bit emotional for me, as all the big parenting steps are, but Elijah told me he really like the idea! I found a lovely, very boyish boat bed on Gumtree and the previous owner very sweetly came and set it up for us in Elijah’s room. The first night in the new bed Elijah realized he could climb out of it. After the seventh night of me putting him back we had a serious conversation. I asked him what was wrong and he told me his boat bed was scary. I said he must be a big boy and he told me that he needs me. Well, I could not argue with that. And in my bed he has stayed. I am hoping that he will at some stage move back to his own room but I presume I will first have to get him an unscary bed. Until then I am enjoying all the snuggles.
Do you co sleep? I would to hear your stories. Pop them in the comments down below.