Dreaded News That Never Came

Dreaded News That Never Came

So, this past week has not been the greatest, in fact it has been absolutely awful. Elijah and I are recovering from a nasty virus, Elijah has not been eating and all I have been doing is eating carbs. It is so horrible to see your little one in poor health and I am so blessed that I have a generally healthy boy. My heart really does go out to the people who have to deal with this on a day to day basis. All my product reviews and photo sessions have been put on hold as all I have wanted to do is bury my head under my gorgeous dusty pink duvet. But of course that is not possible with an poorly toddler.

I have debated with myself on whether to write this or not(so please nobody sue me) but I feel that getting it out in the open will contribute to my healing. We have heard nothing about the cause of Darrell’s helicopter accident in nearly two and a half years. A government organization is appointed to look into it and then file a report. That report is supposed to be made public in less than a year after the accident, failing that they are supposed to supply me with a preliminary report. A year came and went and nothing happened. Close on to two years I was interviewed on Carte Blanche on some irregularities (they are now in the process of being sued, or the intention was put out there). I had tried to contact the organization to no avail. I finally got details on who to contact from the United Kingdom equivalent and sent a quick email off to them. It went unanswered  until Monday, when I got an email back with a cell phone number on the email. I was told a panel of experts where meeting the next day to discuss the case and they would give me a preliminary report the next afternoon. My heart dropped. I immediately wanted to vomit(quite easy actually as we had both been so ill). I obviously did not sleep that night and carbs were not on my mind. I phoned them the next afternoon to find out the information I have been dreading to get for over two years, only to be told the panel has been postponed for a month and that the company Darrell had worked for was suing this organization on the findings on the previous accidents’ report. All in all these are things I have to deal with on an ongoing basis.


Last night I received a message from someone that used to know Darrell ,saying they had found some old pictures of Darrell fighting a fire and would I like them. I obviously said to please send them, as I crave any information about Darrell. I did not realize how upset I would be when the pictures arrived, and I said as much to the sender, for him to reply that naturally I would be upset as that is the helicopter that he died in. Okay, so that I had not know.


So today Elijah and I both got up, me not really having slept again, to such a beautiful day. The air is crisp and fresh and there is the promise of rain tomorrow. My mind is as clear as the day and I am so grateful to all the lovely, caring friends I have made on this journey. Elijah and I are so lucky to have so many wonderful people looking out for us, just generally helping along the way. One thing I have found since the accident is that I want to help people out and share the love, like the love which has been heaped upon us. Everyone is on a journey, but in a different place and we all need to be mindful of that. To the lady shouting at the bank teller, give her a sympathetic smile, to the cold caller phoning you at supper time, say thank you very much for their time, to your domestic worker who is having a grumpy and slow day, make her a cup of tea and tell her to put her feet up for a few minutes as we never know what street of their journey they are on.

Please all have a happy and safe weekend.

Lots of love





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  1. Delrae Spiller aka This is Bentley's world

    You are truest amazing, who knew your struggle and heartache…sending loads of love to you and Elijah and know you have guardian angel looking down on you every minute of everyday xoxo

  2. Anne

    You are strong my friend. Looking forward to coffee next week x

  3. Phoebe

    When we met a few weeks ago, I would never have imagined your pain. You carry yourself with such strength and grace. Now I am an avid follower on IG. Elijah is adorable and I love your photos, but, most of all I learn from you. I’m probably double your age, but your outlook, wisdom and attitude take my breath away. You are a remarkable woman and a pleasure to know. I truly wish you love, joy and happiness in abundance. You deserve nothing less.

    1. Angela Rea

      Aww that is so lovely to say. Thank you so much Phoebe. Xxxx.
      Ps. Have you had cell phone issues? I sent you some messages that bounced back?
      Have a lovely weekend.

  4. Laeni Gittins

    I could never comprehend the pain you have been going through Ange and I have to admit this is your first blog I have read. ( I am finally having a quiet Friday night at home)
    I will now be reading all the rest. (Like an addictive series)

    I hope this is matter is resolved sooner than later. Please keep us updated (No need at all to worry about being sued 😉😉) and hope you both feel better very soon
    Sending you and Elijah ooooodles of love.
    Laens xxx

    1. Angela Rea

      Thanks Laens love, this means a lot. Xxx

  5. Lara Heyn

    Hi Angela. I so love reading your blog. I have a 3 year old and a 4 month old and i often struggle so much as well. I think you are amazing to be soldiering on with such strength. You can do it!!! Love lara

  6. Joléne Zeeman

    I follow all your posts, I really can not think what you’re going through, but you handle it so good and Elijah is so fortunate to have you. I can just imagine your frustration, please let us know when your interview is broadcasted on Carte Blanche. X

    1. Angela Rea

      Hi Jolene! Thanks for the sweet message. The interview was actually aired at the beginning of the year. Xxxx

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